The Long Road Home...

It's not until I try to interact with someone new that I realize how different I have become. Or was I always that way? Good grief, why do I second guess myself? I find myself sounding negative, when inside my heart I feel positive about who I am finally have a chance to become. Why do I have to explain myself? Why would someone care? This is who I am!

Remember for many years I lived in a pretty controlling relationship, that was slowly sucking the very life outta me. To save myself from that end, I dumped my soul into something I could save and that was dogs. And now? It's about being on that long road home to who I really am. I turned 55 this weekend. I can finally have time to reflect on where my life has gone and how quickly it's gone past me. I want to shout to all the young kids out there, slow down, savour the moment, remember this sky! Remember to laugh, don't be afraid to cry, and be kind! The times have changed, the world has changed; I consider myself lucky to lived right here and now! The music I've experienced; the technology... Wow! But it has all zipped past me so fast. I sold myself to dogs for alot of years. It took away my free time, it took away time with my family, my friends, I let it intefere with my job, my marriage; everything. I was in control. I saved dogs with my hands tied behind my back; blind folded... I saved dogs. I didn't really care who got in my way. It consumes you. You meet all kindza other crazy rescue people and you cross over to the dark side, of waking, drinking, eating, sleeping, saving dogs. My trust and faith in humanity is seriously damaged, on so many levels. Sometimes I wonder if I can get back to where I was before? I have to remind myself every day to live in the moment and keep putting one foot in front of the other, cuz this will be a long road to find home. I haven't got anything else going on... *smile*